Fluid Reality
Seems that life is at max, as they call me
life@max. Sometimes I am overshadowed by my pseudo self that shines out with a sinful gleam, It projects what I am not, It projects I'm someone who is arrogant, and unyielding. I search for someone who would understand that I am not what I appear as. I wish someone understands the mind of a poet, my life is about a garden of roses, the fragrance captivates my soul, liberates my sadness, brings me hope.
It's about a woman I imagine who exists, gentle as a newborn and vicious as a wilder beast. Just wish to run into someone who understands all that I can write about, understands that I need to tell her every second minute that i love her, and just lose myself in her eyes. Her eyes are silent, but speak a thousand words, like a splinter her look drives through my heart, I lose myself in that fragment of reality that I forget what life has to offer. I just know I may never run into an entity like that, and if I did I may not be worthy of her.
I still do love this one woman who doesn't probably even understand how much I do, It hurts and they all tell me I'm stupid to be doing this but hey I know love hurts, that is availability, availability is opportunity and opportunity is enterprise. If loving shall subject me to the depths of hell then might as well enjoy that hell ride and then write something each time a tear arises in my eye, and I don't have any tears left for anything else anyway. I've cried and I've cried for you, just in thoughts of losing you when I wake up the next day, but it's all ok now. I miss you and my office keeps me busy,and I don't get to meet you.
I just hope love finds a way, now that you are gone and it's been 7 long years I still look at what I've left behind and what left me behind.
Here's Moiz.
I Stand Alone
We need a song that we can sing and realize how beautiful we can feel even when we are at our lowest. Something that rises deep in our mind, deep from the heart, to lure us away from the sadness of a brief moment. It leaves us happy, though for a few moments but happy nevertheless. I see a sky, filled with stars, you can reach out and touch them connect the dots and then make them look like what you want them , that is what we expect in life, what we think it should be and we lament over it if it renditions otherwise. We all have a short shelf life, we end up in a decay of the past, it rots in out heart but the stench makes us feel captivated, even if it was sad, we are captivated like trapped rats in a swimming pool of sharks. Where we go from there is our choice, we can choose the long road towards redemption or we can take the easy way out and bother ourselves eternally, and do something outright silly. We may fight to be the lesser mortal and disagree with this, but at the core we know,that we know each other.
The Corporate Comedy
I’ve been to office, I’ve literally lived office. It is a place where time almost stands still,you wonder why, you could just be there and wonder why the clock just seems to stay at the same hour for an endless long moment,especially when you want to leave early. It’s the inverse of love itself, you must have experienced (if you are lucky to have taken the risk, a risk in love is not being stubborn, it’s about feeling love and so much that your world would collapse without it) love,maybe once in your life, you sit with someone for three hours straight and you still think its been only a few minutes.
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The psycho in me :-)
Causeway
The sun was up, smiling,warm and thought provoking you could say, sometimes all around us we see a pristine scene which makes us wonder what life is all about, how beautiful it can be. We all choose something and then choose to live with the choice when we know it may have been wrong. Our conscience, maybe, our idiocracy, quite but not quite, we are stubborn, when it comes to certain things we are stubborn. We all know there is no escape in life. We all fight a losing battle. We refrain from accepting it. But we all know. That night when you heard the crackle of the frogs, and the crickets sang in an orchestration you thought you were in love, you never knew the price you would end up paying for it.
Time seems to slow down when you are in love, especially when you are away. We seem to notice everything that moves around us,you can hear the faintest of the sound,see the sparkle of the stream, feel the world moving, spinning around.. You know it always does but it is more so amplified now. Each time the train passes by you watch it leave the station, passing you by, you somethimes talk to yourself watching it leave, you ask it to stop, you ask time to stop,so that you can live in that frame for an eon, I remember a long gone time, she was there with me on the station, we just sat there and I could just ask time to stop, freeze frame and let me be there forever, she seemed so much to me. We all know how it feels to see the first drop of water after your throat has been parched for hours together, when the moment is over you feel like a fish out of water, you gasp, you try to live in the past, it slams back on your face,cold and deceitful.
Darkness
I still remember the days gone by:
I remember when I ran like hell:
I ran, ran as I've never run, I wanted to stop, the pain in my legs wanted me to stop, I could feel every tendon tear,almost, but I couldn't stop, her thoughts wouldn't let me. Each moment I thought of her it would give me a cramp, only adding up to the ones which are already drowning me in the terrible sea of pain. I looked around, the world seemed to be moving away, my reality deteriorating, disintegrating into a strange dust that engulfed me, shadowing my reality, making me lose my grip on it.
I could have killed myself at the very first vechicle that came ploughing down the highway I ran on, I tried but I still couldn't do it, I wanted to wait for the next day, to catch a glimpse of her the next day,while I came to the office, she would be there standing at the station, waiting for the train. She would look pretty,fresh as a pink gerbera daisy, sprinkled with dew,with the morning fog glowing in the orange of the sun that blankets it. They make the mind stop, go gentle, I could have sworn I was insane, I think I was, she thought I was, the only thing she couldn't understand was how much I was and about whom. I just wanted her in my life so bad that each day I missed seeing her, I would feel giddy, I was unable to focus,
Just a little bit about my Sun Sign:
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Scorpio
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Turn ons
Scorpio`s are full of passion and zest for life. They have tremendous drive that can involve you too. Tune in to their wavelength and you can enjoy the harmony and music in life with them. Scorpio`s are loyal and never forget a kind deed done by you. If you want to enjoy life with your Scorpio lover share their passion and intensity and you will be fascinated by how beautiful life can be with them.
Turn offs
Scorpio`s are very passionate and intense but they are also fiercely possessive and would like to possess your mind, body and soul. Do not let seeds of jealousy grow in them because then you may have to suffer agonies of jealousy and discontentment in life. Scorpio`s have explosive tempers be careful how you handle them. They never let anyone know what is going on in their mind till they strike and you may be caught unawares. Do not flirt around in the presence of your Scorpio lover.
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Learning a Language
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Dolyat paani,ani hryudayaat veedana,
heech premachi dili tu bhet,
Majhya manaat aste tu dar kshani,
Tula visrunjao hey honaar naahi,
Ayusshyaat tula bol-lo ekda tari,
prem karto tula jeeva apar,
Tu samazli nahi,tujhi chook nahi,
Majhya bolnyachya padhat chookachi,
Azoon suddha vaat pahtaat,
Tujhya swaranche majhe kaan,
tu nahi disli ki radto jeev maaza,
Tu aahe kai majhyasaathi,
nasel tula kalpana,
Sod,karto re ektrfa prem,
karat raheen aamaran,
pan phakt tulaach, haan.
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My attempt at murdering marathi now. Atleast if you laugh I'll be making your day.
